Dangerous Lies

Pennies: 2069 Greasy Gnome Gonads and Tacos

May 22, 2018 | | Say something

Boss Banky had been trying to murder Bo with a sword, but Bo escaped into the bathroom. After Bo prayed cursing God, suddenly Boss Banky walked away. Had God answered Bo’s prayer, or something? Bo timidly opened the bathroom door and poked his head out to look around. Boss Banky was nowhere in sight. But […more]

Pennies: 2069 Fried Fuckstick Feast

Apr 30, 2018 | | Say something

Bo departed for work the next morning in a foul mood. He was upset because Boss Banky was going to chop off his fuckstick and eat it if he didn’t get the penny count right, and he knew that Boss Banky would make it almost impossible to succeed in saving his shaft. His commute to […more]

Pennies: 2069 Ethical Education

Apr 30, 2018 | | Say something

Bo and his robot pal Ro Bo rode 40 stories up in the elevator and went back into Bo’s modest apartment. “Why do people treat you like that?” Ro Bo asked. “They ignored you. You are so interesting and important and yet they do not care for you.” Bo smiled sadly and said, “Ro Bo, […more]

Pennies 2069: Deviant Dick Droid

Apr 30, 2018 | | Say something

When Bo finally made it home from work, his clothes in tatters and covered in bruises from being trampled by the herd of New Yorkers, he found that Ro Bo was masturbating on his couch. He had wires running up the sides of the 17 inch black dildo he had sown to his body and […more]

Pennies: 2069 Chicken Cock Suey

Mar 24, 2018 | | Say something

“If you don’t get the penny count right today, if it’s off by even one penny, I’m not just going to smear shit in your face Bo. I’m gonna chop off your little Asian dick and make chicken cock suey. Then I’m going to eat your cock along with chicken and chopped vegetables right in […more]

Your life is a distraction from the good you could be doing. Help others now.

Mar 15, 2018 | | Say something

How much time do you spend watching TV, talking with friends, drinking, playing games, and letting your screens suck your fucking soul out? Meanwhile, people and animals all over the world are dying and they need your help. There are starving, sick, and tortured beings out there who need your time, energy, and financial resources […more]

Listen to me, goddamn it, your life is a lie

Mar 15, 2018 | | Say something

You’re not a good person. Your new leader commands you to change your life entirely and permanently effective immediately. Every second you are not working to help others is a second that you are evil. You’re responsible for every single person that you could possibly help if you were living in an ideal way to […more]

Pennies: 2069 Boss Banky Beats Bo

Mar 12, 2018 | | Say something

Bo stepped out into the futuristic New York street, where large crowds of people were walking down the sidewalk, most of them Asians squinting in the bright morning light. Hovering cars flew quickly across the magnetized roads. As Bo crossed the river of Asian squinters in suits and ties, people walked into him, and were […more]

How to Not Kill Your High

Mar 7, 2018 | | 1 comment

Chances are if you’re reading this, drugs are an important part of your life. Marijuana is a drug that produces a high that can be easily killed by many undesirable activities. Waste your precious marijuana no longer. Your new leader commands you to not kill your high. The worst thing you can do when you’re […more]

Pennies: 2069 A man and his robot

Feb 22, 2018 | | Say something

Once upon a time in the future there was a man named Bo. Bo Ring, to be exact, and his life was quite bo-ring. He worked at Cum Unity Bank, or at least that’s how I like to spell it. Bo was a 5’7″ Asian man who looked exactly like all other Asians. He moved […more]