Public Service Announcements

How to Survive a Hurricane: My Hurricane Harvey Story

Sep 1, 2017 | | Say something
how to survive a hurricane

Texas sucks but at least I know how to survive a hurricane.  I’m sorry for the hundreds of lives that have been lost but it really isn’t that hard to come out the victor. You see, people have a hard time thinking about All the Small Things since they are so worried about the big […more]

How to be Great at Selling Drugs

Jul 18, 2017 | | Say something

The best job you could possibly have is to be a drug dealer. No other job in the world earns a higher income and gets more respect from the community. Your new leader commands you to quit your job and start selling drugs! There are risks, but if you’re smart and follow my guide, there is […more]

This Website Will Survive, Motherfuckers

Jul 10, 2017 | | Say something

My name is Michael Ericson and I am better than all of you. That’s not an insult to you, that’s a compliment to me. You’re not bad, I just made you look bad. I created this website 20 months ago to give you my malevolent wisdom, AKA terrible advice, racism, and megalomaniacal nonsense. I’m like […more]

Review of the Tupac Movie

Jun 19, 2017 | | Say something

There is a new movie about the rapper Tupac Shakur out, and I command you to go see it. The story is about a black person who makes a bunch of music and pretends to be some kind of civil rights leader. Tupac makes a lot of money but he is always low on it […more]

The Best Ways to Free Yourself from Existence

Apr 6, 2017 | | Say something

Life. It sucks balls. Our parents didn’t ask our permission to create us, which means we were existence raped. How can we undo this horrible mistake? Getting out of bed, having to do things, never having enough money for all the drugs we want; it’s almost like a demon designed our universe to cackle at […more]

Great Ways to Fuck With People

Feb 17, 2017 | | Say something

Human beings suck ass, unless they’re you. If you’re normal, you have a burning desire to sadistically harm others for the sake of a good laugh. Getting pleasure from the pain of others is what makes humans great. Therefore, being completely insane in both public and private will make good things happen. Don’t think about […more]

How to Deal With A Breakup

Feb 16, 2017 | | Say something

Once upon a time, I had a wonderful girlfriend. We hung out all the time and did activities together, including sexual ones. But now we has broke up, and I lost my best friend and someone who really enjoyed touching my penis. In dealing with this tragic loss, I have discovered many ways to deal with a […more]

White Castles in the Sky

Jan 4, 2017 | | Say something

I am writing this from a combination Church’s Chicken and White Castle. I made a New Year’s resolution to be less racist, so I will simply say a person of unspecified racial origin misheard my order and repeated it back to me in such a thick Indian accent that I couldn’t understand it. Those who […more]

Wendy’s Nonsense

Jan 1, 2017 | | Say something

I am in a Wendy’s in Canton, Michigan. Someone is babbling in a foreign language. It probably doesn’t sound like babbling to them, but it sure as shit does to me. They have an attractive redhead in the Wendy’s commercials, however the real Wendy who the restaurant was named after, the daughter of the founder, […more]

Ideas for a New Year’s Resolution

Dec 31, 2016 | | Say something

You might be wondering what new year’s resolution to make. Most people forget about their resolution within 6 weeks of making them, so the best resolution is the one that is easy to remember, or one that can be done in 6 weeks. The simplest resolutions are the best. Since I am a super genius I will […more]