Shortened Stories

CARTOON ANIMAL asshole CULT: A PICTURE BOOK Part 2 Anus

Jan 7, 2018 | | Say something

In our previous installment of CARTOON ANIMAL asshole CULT, Gayraff the bisexual giraffe quit his job at the dildo testing factory because he needed larger objects to please his anus. So, he tricked several animals and a Jew into his apartment and locked them inside. They are becoming his anus pleasing slaves at this very […more]

CARTOON ANIMAL asshole CULT: A PICTURE BOOK part 1

Jan 6, 2018 | | Say something

Once upon a time in a fictional world where animals talk and are basically like people, there was a giraffe named Gayraff. Gayraff was actually bisexual though. He was 16 feet tall with a 20-inch penis. When he talked he sounded a 90-year-old woman who had chain-smoked constantly for the last 85 years. He was […more]

Guest Post: Sex with dogs part 1, trip to the Dog Pound(ing my pussy)

Dec 3, 2017 | | Say something

I have always been interested in animals in a very sexual way. My name is Virginia Rose, and I am here to tell you all about the joys of having large dogs fuck you silly. When I was younger, just a teenager, I became ashamed of my attraction to dogs and cats. Whenever I told […more]

Officer Balls Part 3: Eat Shit and Thrive

Nov 19, 2017 | | Say something

Cucky heard him warn, “You make a run for it boy, and the next one goes in your nutsack. If you don’t give me no trouble, I won’t give you any either.” Cucky wondered what he meant by that. Weren’t they trying to be justice hammers? The criminal got into the backseat of the car […more]

Officer Balls Part 2: Cucky Helps Catch a Crackhead

Nov 19, 2017 | | Say something

“I’m just trying to do my job, son. It’s imperative that I keep intoxicated drivers off the road. Since you won’t do my walking test, I suppose I’ll have to see how you drive first-hand. Get in the car, boy. We’re going for a ride.” “Where are we going?” “Wherever the hell I tell you,” […more]

Officer Balls Part 1: Drunk Driver Gets a Testicle Taze

Nov 19, 2017 | | Say something

“Get out of the car! Put your hands where I can see them!” Officer Balls shouted in a southern accent. The driver could see his own reflection in the policeman’s silver sunglasses and noticed a slight cowlick in his messy brown hair. He reached up to smooth it down. Hold still you bastard!” Officer Balls […more]

BLOOD OF CHRIST

Jun 7, 2017 | | Say something

Lou loved going to church. He believed in God and considered his faith the most valuable thing in his life. Every Sunday Morning, he would drive to the Church of Christ-God-Jesus-Mary-Joseph and join hundreds of other Christians from his upper-middle class suburban township. Lou walked into church an hour before the sermon on a beautiful […more]

No Heroin in Heaven

Jun 7, 2017 | | Say something

Jeremy stood facing the chalkboard, so close to it that some of his spiky blonde hair pressed against it. He had a rubber band wrapped tightly around his left bicep; it pressed deep into his skin. He rolled up the left sleeve of his black hoodie and felt around for one of his remaining good […more]

Doctor Morthrod 6

Nov 22, 2016 | | Say something

Doctor Morthrod dreamed of a day when all the darks could dine with the lights at KFC, the way laundry should never be done. Then he woke up while being wheeled towards the emergency room. The ceiling seemed like a river flowing past his face, with the occasional island of fluorescent light. The back of his […more]

Raping O’Reilly

Oct 17, 2016 | | Say something

There’s nothing funny about rape. I should know; my name is Toby Bryant and I traveled across America for 20 years, raping white women in hotel rooms. Admittedly these women agreed to be raped and they weren’t all white, I just made them spread bird shit on their face like the Japanese do so that […more]