Shortened Stories

Pennies: 2069 Chicken Cock Suey

Mar 24, 2018 | | Say something

“If you don’t get the penny count right today, if it’s off by even one penny, I’m not just going to smear shit in your face Bo. I’m gonna chop off your little Asian dick and make chicken cock suey. Then I’m going to eat your cock along with chicken and chopped vegetables right in […more]

Pennies: 2069 Boss Banky Beats Bo

Mar 12, 2018 | | Say something

Bo stepped out into the futuristic New York street, where large crowds of people were walking down the sidewalk, most of them Asians squinting in the bright morning light. Hovering cars flew quickly across the magnetized roads. As Bo crossed the river of Asian squinters in suits and ties, people walked into him, and were […more]

Pennies: 2069 A man and his robot

Feb 22, 2018 | | Say something

Once upon a time in the future there was a man named Bo. Bo Ring, to be exact, and his life was quite bo-ring. He worked at Cum Unity Bank, or at least that’s how I like to spell it. Bo was a 5’7″ Asian man who looked exactly like all other Asians. He moved […more]


Feb 3, 2018 | | Say something

When we left off in the last part, Big Dick Monkey and the hippos, Mr. Hippo and Phyllis, had just pleasured and damaged Gayraff’s giraffe ass hole. Now the polar bear with dreadlocks and no tits returned and introduced herself as “RainSnow”. In his raspiest voice, Gayraff asked, “What have you brought to pleasure my […more]


Jan 7, 2018 | | Say something

In our previous installment of CARTOON ANIMAL asshole CULT, Gayraff the bisexual giraffe quit his job at the dildo testing factory because he needed larger objects to please his anus. So, he tricked several animals and a Jew into his apartment and locked them inside. They are becoming his anus pleasing slaves at this very […more]


Jan 6, 2018 | | Say something

Once upon a time in a fictional world where animals talk and are basically like people, there was a giraffe named Gayraff. Gayraff was actually bisexual though. He was 16 feet tall with a 20-inch penis. When he talked he sounded a 90-year-old woman who had chain-smoked constantly for the last 85 years. He was […more]

Guest Post: Sex with dogs part 1, trip to the Dog Pound(ing my pussy)

Dec 3, 2017 | | Say something

I have always been interested in animals in a very sexual way. My name is Virginia Rose, and I am here to tell you all about the joys of having large dogs fuck you silly. When I was younger, just a teenager, I became ashamed of my attraction to dogs and cats. Whenever I told […more]

Officer Balls Part 3: Eat Shit and Thrive

Nov 19, 2017 | | Say something

Cucky heard him warn, “You make a run for it boy, and the next one goes in your nutsack. If you don’t give me no trouble, I won’t give you any either.” Cucky wondered what he meant by that. Weren’t they trying to be justice hammers? The criminal got into the backseat of the car […more]

Officer Balls Part 2: Cucky Helps Catch a Crackhead

Nov 19, 2017 | | Say something

“I’m just trying to do my job, son. It’s imperative that I keep intoxicated drivers off the road. Since you won’t do my walking test, I suppose I’ll have to see how you drive first-hand. Get in the car, boy. We’re going for a ride.” “Where are we going?” “Wherever the hell I tell you,” […more]

Officer Balls Part 1: Drunk Driver Gets a Testicle Taze

Nov 19, 2017 | | Say something

“Get out of the car! Put your hands where I can see them!” Officer Balls shouted in a southern accent. The driver could see his own reflection in the policeman’s silver sunglasses and noticed a slight cowlick in his messy brown hair. He reached up to smooth it down. Hold still you bastard!” Officer Balls […more]