Shortened Stories

Doctor Morthrod 4

Aug 13, 2016 | | Say something

Dextromethorphan, when digested in syrup form, can take a while to absorb into the bloodstream. Food eaten before the red invasion can take priority in the digestive system, delaying its absorption into the bloodstream. Syrup can slide behind a large load of food and not be broken down until up to two hours later. Doctor […more]

The New New Testament 7

Aug 13, 2016 | | Say something

Jewsus began touring the Midwest, getting rides from homosexual truckers with ulterior motives to major cities such as Cincinnati, Chicago, Cleveland, Lansing, and Indianapolis. He yelled in their churches, taught them about the coming pleasures of the Cloud Land that they would have as long as they did what he said, and healed many Americans […more]

Lying For Sex Part 13

Aug 12, 2016 | | Say something

At the end of the bar, a Mexican wearing a sombrero made of taco shells calls over Jessica so that she can pour him another shot of tequila. Like most strip clubs, “Titties” plays that song that says “She’s my cherry pie,” every thirty minutes and it makes me want to give myself a bleach […more]

Extremely Gay

Aug 11, 2016 | | Say something

His cock pierced my face like a scream pierces the ears, harshly and painfully. But the taste. It was the most delicious meaty taste imaginable, a hot summer sausage with bitter salty goo leaking out of the tip. He held my skull still and humped forcefully, his strong muscular back and hips driving his thick […more]

Lying For Sex Part 12

Aug 8, 2016 | | Say something

After our date at the bar, a week passes, and it is difficult to schedule a date due to Jessica’s night shifts bartending at the strip club. So I text her to ask her if it would be okay if I visited her at work, and she agrees. At 9:00 P.M on Tuesday night I […more]

Lying For Sex Part 11

Aug 5, 2016 | | Say something

Jessica rhythmically rubs her big butt against my wiener, which is beginning to become flaccid after I ejaculated in my pants. Since I don’t want her to think that I have erectile dysfunction, I decide it is time to leave the bar and take her home, so that she can puke on her floor, which […more]

Lying For Sex Part 10

Aug 4, 2016 | | Say something

After I finish eating my terrible-tasting tater-tots, an ingenious idea pops into my penis head. I stand up and grab Jessica’s hand, which is sweaty. I get my hand wet and that is displeasing. I gently guide her to her feet and find that she can stumble well enough to get to the dance floor. […more]

Lying For Sex Part 9

Aug 2, 2016 | | Say something

Jessica is drunk as a fish. For a woman who is 5’3″, seven drinks means getting smashed, in the less interesting way. By the way, women are midgets. She leans forward against the mahogany counter and uses it to support her titties so that the edge of the counter won’t stab into her titties and […more]

Lying For Sex Part 8

Jul 31, 2016 | | Say something

Jessica reads my card, and when she sees the pubes glued in the shape of a heart, she squeals with delight. Women love receiving pubic hair as a gift. Fuck flowers, fuck diamonds, women want a man’s pubes, especially if they haven’t known him for very long. They will glue them to their faces and […more]

I Can’t Enjoy Lunch at Work Anymore

Jul 30, 2016 | | Say something

It’s happening right now.  I’m 3/4 through the work day and it’s time to enjoy some scrumptious well-earned lunch.  It’s a time of relaxation and to give yourself a chance to recharge for the last 2 hours of work.  Only getting off work on a Friday rivals the importance of this delicious weekday ritual.  And […more]