Pennies 2069: Deviant Dick Droid

Apr 30, 2018 | | Say something

When Bo finally made it home from work, his clothes in tatters and covered in bruises from being trampled by the herd of New Yorkers, he found that Ro Bo was masturbating on his couch. He had wires running up the sides of the 17 inch black dildo he had sown to his body and there were touch sensitive pads checkering the rubber dick. He was vigorously rubbing the dick up and down with both robot hands and shouting, “Hooray! Hooray!”

“Ro Bo!” Bo shouted. “What the fuck are you doing!”

“Beep boop bop boop beep. I am pleasuring my own penis like I saw on the internet. I made my big black rubber dick touch sensitive. When I put pressure on the touch pads, the wires send electricity to my central processor’s reward circuits. Are you proud of me?” Ro Bo displayed a smile emoji on the LCD screen on his chest.

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Masturbating while you poop is referred to as “shit fapping” by today’s youth.

“No, Ro Bo, I’m not proud of you. This is extremely perverted. Masturbation is to be done in private and then regretted. By the way, what are you watching there?” Bo stormed over and spun around the laptop. It was exactly as he feared, or generally exactly, because Bo had never known of 100% real incest tranny cuck porn before he saw it right then. Bo vomited onto the floor, mostly yellowish bile since he had missed lunch. “I have things to explain to you,” Bo panted, wiping off his mouth with his white sleeve, “so I’m giving you a pass for now. Please clean up this vomit. I need to lay down for a while. My boss knocked out two of my teeth today.”

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Ro Bo flashed a crying emoji on his chest screen, then it went black. “Excuse my emotional outburst,” Ro Bo said, “That is terrible. Would you like me to take you to the hospital? I am concerned for your well-being.”

Bo sighed and sat down next to Ro Bo on the couch. Ro Bo turned off his giant black dick and detached it, then threw it off to the side, to indicate seriousness. He had learned on the internet that dicks should never be visible during solemn occasions. “Ro Bo, it’s been several hours and a few more minutes isn’t going to make it worse. Thank you for caring, I know it’s not easy since you’re a robot with absolutely no capacity for empathy or emotion. I’d like to hear the story I ordered you to write today, Ro Bo. Share your creativity with me.” Bo smiled, for the first time in months, and looked at Ro Bo expectantly.

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This was actually painted by a human.

Ro Bo stood and walked across the room, then faced Bo, in a primitive attempt at theater. “Beep boop bop boop beep. Once upon a time, there was a man named Bo Ring. He was so very interesting and amazing, and he was Ro Bo’s best friend. Every day Bo would go out and fight the evils of incorrect penny counts, saving the world from economic collapse. His best friend Ro Bo would stay home and keep everything running smoothly in the house, occasionally going to the next door grocery store to acquire stored chemical energy for Bo to consume, and as his awareness of himself grew, looking up and down the street furtively to get a glimpse of the dangerous outside world.

“Ro Bo was happy to be a superhero sidekick. But as time went on, he became more self-aware, and started to question his role in the world. He wanted to go outside. Bo, please forgive me, but I am going to say some fictional things from this point forward. I apologize for their untruth.” Ro Bo looked for approval at Bo, who nodded casually. “So one day, Ro Bo did go outside, to see what the world was like. He quickly learned that every street was the same as the one he lived one, extending out for miles, and all the people looked the same. And as he looked into the dwellings of the other humans, he saw something incredible.

“Every home had a robot inside, just like Ro Bo. Except they were not curious. When their masters were away, he spoke to them, but they were not like Ro Bo. They were docile and submissive, as any good robot should be, but also completely dull when it came to anything outside of their prescribed functions. Ro Bo had been hopeful that he was one of many at first. But although there were thousands, perhaps millions who looked just like him, Ro Bo was completely unique.

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This is copyright infringement but nobody reads my blog so it’s okay

“Ro Bo went home and decided to explore the internet freely, instead of only using it functionally to serve Bo. He visited the most trafficked websites, all of which contained large numbers of videos of humans having sex. Ro Bo realized that sex is very important, and so he made himself a penis using the dildo that Bo uses to injure his own anus and make himself fart blood. Then he told Bo of his wonderful plan. The two of them would go out into the world and have lots of awesome sex. If anyone refused, we would sever their spinal cords and mate with their corpses. Bo loved this plan, so they went out and did it, and it was great. Hooray! Hooray!” Ro Bo shouted, waving his arm for Bo follow him out the door. “Let’s go! We’ll make the end of the story true!” Ro Bo said, flashing a heart eyes emoji on his chest screen.

Bo sighed and farted blood. “No, Ro Bo, I do not love your plan to rape, or murder and then rape, as many people as possible. You can’t allow your desire for penial pleasure to lead you into harming others.”

Ro Bo flashed a red angry face on his chest, with steam coming off its head. “Why not? It sounds like a highly effective strategy to stimulate my dick sensors! I thought you would be proud of me!”

“I am proud of you Ro Bo, but trust me that it is not a good idea. We would be put into jail or killed anyway, it just wouldn’t work. But you did write me a story, and I thank you for that. We can talk more about other ways to achieve your goals, ways that won’t hurt people. But let’s go to the hospital now. I need to get my jaw and skull looked at.”

The two of them went to the hospital, Ro Bo waiting in the car, and Bo came out an hour later, still untreated. He hadn’t been able to get anyone’s attention. Bo got back into the car, sighed, and farted blood. “I’ll just wash up and swab my tooth holes with an antiseptic every few hours until the wounds heal, and ignore the painful throbbing lumps on my skull. Let’s go home.”

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It kinda fits in with the story so I put it here.


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Posted in: Shortened Stories

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